November 21, 2012

Wobble While You Work

Like many foreward thinking worplaces, my employer has provided several resources we can use to enrich our day to day experience with the company.  I have yet to take advantage of the 15 minute massage offerings, but the walkstation and I have become fairly close over the last month.

What we have is a standing workstation area fitted with a special treadmill that tops out a 2 miles per hour.  There are no handrails because the theory is, you'll be typing while walking, so you won't need them.  Once you clip the safety auto-stop to your clothes, set your weight and speed, you're off and puffing.  Or at least I was.  (My greatest fear was to have a caller hear the humming of the machine in the background and hear my heavier than normal breathing and get the absolute wrong message about which number they'd dialed.) 

The medical community is quick to tell you about walking.  Heck, even standing has been shown to be better for you than sitting.   Walking gets you up and moving.  It works your stabilizer muscles, stretches out your legs and back, and helps you burn extra calories.  If you're at a gym and can crank up the speed or incline, you can really get your heart going, and cardio is good for you!  The more you work your heart, the better it functions.  But, there's a dirty little secret nobody tells you before you climb on up and start moving.  Well, since I have no shame, I'm going to tell you.

Walking makes you poop.

And I'm not just talking "Oh, gee.  When I get off of here, I should go to the bathroom."  I'm talking panicked, stain inducing, hurry up and get your damn password changed you old coot.  I need to get to hovering over the stool so I don't take a second bath with the backsplash from the force of this, I have to shit NOW, poop. 

So, if you're lucky enough to have a treadmill workstation where you work, take my advice.  If you skip the "consult a physician before using this equipment" step, make sure you're not wearing the good panties and eating your grape nuts in too large a portion before you saddle up.  Trust me on this one.  It'll save you the waddle of shame down the hallway.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.